Thursday, January 18, 2018

Hi Dad it's me. .

Hi Dad it's me. . I have not forgotten you, I still think about you daily, some days each hour, some days each minute and some days each second the end of the year came and went  and I felt the hurt of not celebrating your birthday with you, then the new year arrived and I quickly fell into that dark place that I go to form,  time tot ime the place wear your death engulfs my life, my thoughts and my inner being starts to suffocate.
I hate reliving that god dam dreaded day, I hate hearing mom's voice saying "Dad's gone Dad died" what on earth happened why in hell did god need you then, why the hell was it a good time to go, I never will know but I can only hope and pray it was one dam good reason, please,tell me it was.
The thought of you not being around simply devastates me in so many ways. Too many to mention.
Well Dad I will continur to remember and come back and blog yes cause tbis is part of my healing